Wishes and Memory

Sometime i wish i am a animation character ....
At least i given a target on what should i do and just follow the storyboard that the writer written .... Sometime life would be easy when let the fate carry me away ....
Follow the same path my whole life through .
Although i know i cant , but i wish it can .

Life is weird , when you run out of choice , you wish there is more choice ; when you got a lot of choice , you wish there is less choice . 

This night, i start thinking .... About future , about past , about you .....
Every time there will be tear come out from my eye ....
I'm not crying ,
but the tear flow out by itself . Maybe my heart is sad , but my face have no expression about that . Is sad that there is no answer for my question .
Every time keep telling myself to move on ....
But end up waiting,
waiting in the past.

Some memory are hard to forget , some are easy .
Maybe because I don-t gave in ,i don-t believe it , i don-t accept it ....
I do not allow it to become true ....
Maybe this is the price to pay for doing that .

Is not that i like using computer whole day , is just that ....
I need to keep myself busy , so that i could stop thinking about those unpleasant memory .... Running away , Afraid , yes i am and i always afraid .
I keep hiding things inside , running away from problem , i want to help but i have not enough spirit to do it and i afraid .

I remember what vanille say : 

no , 

i swear i would not run away anymore ,

 i rather fight and lose

 than give up without even trying . 

And also yuna : 

i will live in my sorrow ,

i will live up my life , 

i will stand my ground and be strong ,

i will defeat sorrow . 

I don't know when will it be but i will conquer it , 

and i will do it without false hope .i will stand my ground and be strong ,

I wish i had their spirit .... Am i ready to face it ? Am i brave enough ? I don-t know ....

Yuna said : 

if we get seperated , 

just whistle , 

i will come by running , i promise .... 

A girl can make a promise like that to her guardian and also friend .... Do i have this chance ? Even i have , i think no one will appear .... Cause i don-t know how to whistle ....

★愿幻星✖傑尐☆　　上
12.38 AM
10 MARCH 2011